I think I'm going to do this....

I have registered many a blog over the past few years. I'm one of those people google/blogger/wordpress/blogspot/tom/dick/harry can't stand, I'm sure of it!

I always have such good intentions too, truly I do! But alas...real life gets in the way. I get very busy with work, I get super happy and have lots going on - no time to blog OR I get kind of bored and don't have a lot going on - no reason to blog...excuses, excuzez, boolsheets.

Anywho, I think i'm going to try this again. My last (and only) entry was about a year and a month ago, so, perraps this time of year, I have a higher blogging hankering than at other times? Me no know. My birthday did just pass tho, so...maybe? Reflection and ish.

Reading my first entry tho, wooo, it made me ever so slightly teary eyed. I remember that day really well too. [Note to self: Don't blog when emotional, smh]. Well, no one to share my good and crappy days with yet, but it's a-okay. I do a very, very good job of putting on my big gurl pannies, and keeping those heffaz in place by myself, cos big girls don't cry...except for once a month, when your hormones are a vengeful frenemy, whose sole purpose is to see you crumble in a pool of your saltwater tears, adrift on an island of......too much? Yeah well, other than those days? I got this.

I Wish...

Being an adult is hard. Very hard. It wasn't until I became an adult, that I realized you can experience some fabulous experiences in your life....right alongside some pretty sh*tty ones. It's never all good, or all bad at the same time. I became an adult and realized life is this bitter-sweet cocktail of joyful and not so joyful experiences, happening side-by-side.

My life is pretty good, and I am able to see the great aspects without having to squint too hard. But sometimes, I play the 'wish' game. Today is one of those days. 

Today, I wish, really wish, really, really, REALLY wish, that once again, there's someone there at the end of the day. I run my own business and it's hard. It's growing, getting more clients, making more money...and with that comes additional worries, stress and juggling acts. And on days like today, where I've spent the WHOLE day in production, I'm worried the team and I might not make the deadline, I'm concerned that I spent too much money last month, and it's going to bite me in the a*s...again, I'm not sure I can make it to the seminar tomorrow morning (because of the deadline), even though I really, really, want to go, annoyed with myself for losing 10 pounds and falling tumbling off the wagon... I just wish there was someone, a special someone to call me up, take me out, hug me, and let me know it's going to be okay. Remind me that everything always works out. Recognize that i'm having a bit of a pity party, but allowing me that little luxury, because I need it today. 

I know how to be strong for myself, and I do it very well, but sometimes, like today, my oh my, I wish there was someone to share some of this with me. 

I used to have that, it felt great. Will I ever feel that again? I wish...